The Pink Pages
003
๐ Are You Asking For Too Much? Or Are You Asking The Wrong Person?๐
Let’s have a little girl talk.
Have you ever found yourself wondering, “Am I asking for too much?” You want consistency. You want communication. You want someone who actually keeps their word. You want to feel appreciated, respected, and considered. You want someone excited to see you, not someone you have to convince to make time for you.
And then suddenly, you start questioning yourself.
Girl… pause. ๐
Sometimes the problem isn't that you're asking for too much. Sometimes you're simply asking the wrong person.
๐ The Right Person Won't Make You Feel Guilty For Having Standards
Having standards doesn't mean expecting perfection.
Nobody is perfect. People get busy. People make mistakes. Relationships require patience, communication, and compromise. But there's a difference between understanding someone's imperfections and constantly making excuses for behavior that leaves you feeling unimportant.
Wanting basic respect isn't being difficult.
Wanting honesty isn't being dramatic.
Wanting communication isn't being clingy.
Wanting someone to actually put effort into getting to know you isn't asking for the moon.
The right person may not always get everything right, but they should care enough to try.
๐ Sometimes You’re Not “Too Much”—You’re Just With Someone Who Gives Too Little
This is the part nobody wants to admit.
Sometimes we shrink ourselves to fit into relationships that were never big enough for us.
We stop asking questions because we don't want to seem annoying. We stop expressing our feelings because we don't want to start an argument. We pretend we're okay with the bare minimum because we're scared that asking for more will make the other person leave.
But think about it…
Why are you working so hard to become easier to love?
You shouldn't have to silence yourself just to keep someone's attention.
You shouldn't have to constantly prove that you're worth effort.
And you definitely shouldn't have to compete with someone's lack of interest.
๐ But Let's Be Honest… Standards Go Both Ways
Now, I'm not saying every expectation is automatically reasonable.
There is a difference between having healthy standards and expecting someone to read your mind, never make mistakes, or revolve their entire life around you.
A healthy relationship requires two people.
You communicate what you need. They communicate what they need. You listen. They listen. You compromise when it makes sense. You respect each other's boundaries.
It's not about finding someone who checks every single box.
It's about finding someone whose values align with yours.
๐ So… Are You Asking For Too Much?
Before you lower your standards, ask yourself a different question:
“Would I consider this unreasonable if the person I loved was asking for it?”
If your friend told you she wanted someone who communicated with her, respected her, kept their promises, and made her feel valued, would you tell her she's asking for too much?
Probably not.
So why do we sometimes give ourselves less than we'd encourage our friends to accept?
Maybe you aren't asking for too much.
Maybe you've simply been asking someone who doesn't have the willingness, maturity, or desire to give it to you.
And that's okay.
Not everyone is your person.
๐ธ Reminder ๐ธ
You don't need to become less loving, less caring, less expressive, or less yourself to be easier for someone else to handle.
Keep your standards realistic, healthy, and rooted in self-respect.
And remember:
The goal isn't to find someone who gives you everything you ask for.
It's to find someone who genuinely wants to build something where both of you feel heard, respected, appreciated, and safe.
So the next time you're sitting there wondering,
“Am I asking for too much?”
Maybe ask yourself:
“Or am I asking the wrong person?” ๐
And honestly, girl…
That question might change everything. ๐
With love,
K.♡︎
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